Adolescent Mental Health

By Bonnie Lane, M.S.
Family Support Center

The brains of adolescents are constantly growing and their emotions and thought processes are always changing. If you are sensing that your middle school or high school student may be struggling with their mental health, don’t ignore your instincts.

Here are some practical steps to take, with the help of teachers, counselors, school social workers and the child’s primary health-care provider.

1. Reflect on how the first semester went.

Assess any changes you’ve noticed in your child, academically, emotionally and socially. If they were a good student previously but brought home lower grades after the first semester, a lot of things could be at work – not all related to mental health. Perhaps they simply find the workload too challenging, and don’t know how to express that.

Other things to notice:
● Did their circle of friends shrink, or are they no longer hanging out with longtime friends?
● Did they stop making plans and going out, preferring to remain in their bedroom?
● Are they attending school regularly and willingly?
● Are they completing assignments on time without prompting?

2. Talk to school staff.

As a parent, you are only seeing half the equation. You need to gather all the information you can, so the next stop is with their teachers and counselors. Does your student seem lost in class or have trouble concentrating? Have they been referred to a school social worker? Have the teachers noticed signs of their being picked on or bullied? Are they sitting alone at lunch?

3. Schedule an appointment with their primary health-care provider.

Next, take your concerns to their primary health-care provider to rule out a physical illness. A health-care provider may try to minimize or dismiss your concerns, saying, “All kids go through this” or “He’s a teen-ager after all.” You know your child best, so don’t ignore concerning behaviors or attitudes. It’s possible they have an undiagnosed mood disorder or ADHD or are delayed in emotional growth.

4. Seek therapy.

If there’s nothing physically wrong, it’s time to find a therapist who can get your child to talk about what’s going on. If the therapist notices a mood or thought issue, they may recommend a visit to a psychiatrist. Only a licensed psychiatrist, not a physician, should prescribe and manage psychiatric medications.

This is very important: Support your child through this journey. Tell them that you are proud of them as they make strides to work on any mental health issue. If others ask what’s going on with your child, choose your words carefully and only acknowledge a concern if appropriate. Everyone is entitled to privacy.

Growing up in the post-COVID era can be challenging, and many struggle because of the socialization and in-person education they missed. As a family and a community you will find your way.

Bonnie Lane, M.S., is principal consultant with Family Support Services in Northbrook, Illinois, specializing in supporting families whose loved ones suffer from severe mental illness or substance addiction. Contact her at 847-651-1554 or bonnielane@thefamilysupportservices.com.